This shall be a long post .
Once and for all , i saying all out .

Ever since my thing started . All of you have been commenting and advising me to change back to myself . Its you , Seng kiat . You came to my blog and post to let me know and i can say that i have been trying very hard to get back with all of you . But , think about it . Just a few days you told me that and you start to ignore me . I was like , wad is this ? You told me to change and you ignore me ? I know you hav your family problems , but i still give you time to cool down . But u still choose to ignore me . What is this ??

Take for example tt day i ask everyone out to play basketball . Just one day before our practical . You noe wads the reason i ask all of you out ? I just wanted to get intact with you guys back . Do you actually noe that i have a quarrel with my mum before i came out ? I ignore her just becos of all of you . I actually only have a check-up not long ago before asking you all out that day . In my life , i can say i make alot of sacrifies for you guys . Example , I was in pain that day and was like totally feel like my ligaments will tear any moment . But , did i tell you guys ? Did i stop playing ? No . I still continue to play with you guys . I just endure the pain myself and ease my pain by eating pain killer . Reason why i did all these is because i want everyone to have a happy day .

For these two years of friendships and brothership with you guys . I have make alot of sacrifises . All those outings , kbox sessions , birthday parties .. I have always been the one that paying extra more . I did not even grumble about why i am always the one paying more , but its that i just wants everyone to be happy , have a good and enjoyable day . But , everytime when you guys said that going out with me would make you guys pocket a hole , do you guys actually noes how i feel ? True , wq says that you all dont meant it . But , if you guys dont meant it , why in the first place still have to say it ?

You said that u dont say things behind me . Than i have a question for you . Why is it when you fiund out that i got kittylab tickets for Jacq and you're so piss off ? Even said that on that day playing ball should actually make my injury more worst and let me spend my holidays in the hospital instead ? At the very first place , i can say i did back out . I even told Jacq . But why i dint in the end ? Its not becos i thinks that i have make a wrong choice and decided to take back my words , but its her . She's the one that holds me back . You guys always thinks that i like to say a thing and fail to do so in the end , but do you think i dont want to explain to you guys ? Do you guys actually give me a chance by explaining to all of you ?

From the very start when i decided to back out , i have alrdy lost confidence . do you know why i back ou t? All becos of you . for once again i can sacrifise myself for you . If i back out can make you happy . why not ? Its all becos of you . I lost all my confidence . I've alrdy told weiqi , i have no more confidence in wooing her back . Who she accepts or rejects , i would just accept the fate and would not beg or bludge on her . I can sacrifise my relationship just for friendship and brothership , but can you do it ? you got so angry just when i bought tickets for her , but did i get angry when she is always out with you ??

Talking about im PROUD of myself and look down on all of you . Think about it again . If im too proud and look down on you guys , would i be giving in in basketball ? Will i be lik showing off and say no one can win me ?Asking you guys to improve in your skills first than compete with me again ? Insult you guys ? There's never ever i think that my basketball is perfect . When i say that theres a gap in between even you guys train and i trian too . Its the Basic IQ you dont get it . Just for example , if theres a guy weak in maths and is studying ver hard to compete with a guys that is ver strong in it and is still studying very hard to master it . Tell me , wld the weak be able to catch up ? Yes , he can . But it would take a serious long time . Im not insulting u that u hav no IQ but its just that why can you cant think in the simple way but rather in the complicated way ?

You insulted my basketball in front of all of them by saying my skills is not even capable to play SF . Do you know how it feels when a basketballer that plays basketball for 8 years and have always been playing that position feels like ? The moment i heard that do you actually notice that my face and tone change ? I can tell you that wq did notice that , but did i give you attitude ? No . I hold back , but you still keep on saying that . I feel insulted at that very moment you know ? I can tell you if im still the Adrian that is very violence , i can asure you that at the moment i wld have already give you a straight punch in your face . But did i ? Im not the Adrian that is unreasonable and always use violence anymore . I consider for everyone else first . But i dont consider for myself first , never always thinks for myself first but the rest .

Aren't you always likes to take things that are already the past and likes to say me again when the rest have already decided to let the matter rest and not to go and think about it ? You always like to dig everything from tha past and say me isn't it ? I can tell you , i dont even deserve this kind of treatment from you at all . So if you're going to continue , So be it . Let the others see and think that you hold on to things . thats wad i can say .

Dont be a fool that thinks that i fighting with you because of Jacq . Im just not happy with the attitude you gave to me . Plus , if you guys thinks that im always thinking im right and dont take others comment , would i have listen to youu guys and change myself ? Wont i be ignoring all your comments already if i think im always right ? And tell me , did i ever look down on you ? Did i tell you to always do things no matter wad i say ? Am i like you that says that i have to listen to you at all times ? I didnt . In this 2 years , whenever we play basketball , i did not do all these things . Not a single one .

You might be thinking that , WAAAA .... I very noble wor ... always give in and make sacrifise wor ... Than you're wrong . To me , sometimes a little of sacrifise that can bring happiness to everyone , Why not ?

For now , I would make the first step by apologizing first . Because i know if one party that dun stop this first , the other wld not let it rest . So now , Im sorry .. for once and for all , stop this stupid fight . Whether to end this would be up to you . Sorry . Thats all .